Aries season is calling you out
Peacefully sinking into a guided meditation, I breathed, grounded, and basked in a nice warm glow. All was going good so far. Imagine a person I need to set a boundary with standing in front of me. Okay, starting to question why I would bring this irritating person into my morning meditation, but I give it a go. Next, I’m told to expand my golden light out as the boundary between us. I’m not digging the direction this is going in. Then the instructor says make the boundary permeable. Open to the other person’s perspective, so we can create my boundary together. And I’m like, “Nope, that’s BS. I’m outta here.”
That’s the key — for yourself. Boundaries are about you and no one else. Your boundaries are your own, and no one else has any input. Other people don’t even need to know what your limits are. It’s none of their beeswax.
There’s no need to declare your boundaries to anyone
Other people aren’t responsible for maintaining or honoring your boundaries either. This is one of the biggest misunderstandings I see on this topic. Hands on our hips, we declare, “This is my boundary,” and expect the receiver to uphold it. That’s backwards. Our borders are our own concern, period. We’re the ones charged with maintaining them.
Simply put, boundaries are what works for you and what doesn’t. For you. Not anyone else. No one else’s opinion, perspective, or weigh-in is required or even desired. Boundaries come down to, is this thing ok for you or not ok for you, period. That’s it. Other people don’t get to decide where your lines lie. They’re your lines.
You don’t even have to share them. For example, if I’m not eating sugar for a month, I don’t have to tell anyone. I can skip the cake at a party without having anyone get their nose in my business or worse, pressuring me to, “C’mon, just have a little taste.” If I’m having an issue with a neighbor’s behavior, I can remove myself. Smile and back away.
Alright, let’s make this harder. Say your spouse is doing something that isn’t working for you, like smoking weed all the time. You can speak up and say you don’t like that. But here’s the rub, you don’t have any control over them. They don’t have to do what you want. Their boundary is different than yours. If it keeps bugging you to the point where you’re not digging hanging out with them anymore, you now have other boundaries to consider. The next choices may not be easy, but if you’re not happy with the situation, you’re the one in control of your life. This may sound harsh, but if you keep staying despite your boundary, it’s you who’s crossing it.
Aries season pushes you to hold your boundaries
Aries is a fiery, don’t-get-in-my-way energy that helps you find your inner boundary crossing guard. You may not be ready to take the action of leaving your relationship, job, or friendship yet, but you can increase your awareness of where your lines lie — what’s working and not working for you. Start taking responsibility for where you are crossing your own boundary. Explore why you keep overstepping it. What’s underlying that choice? Fear? Self-doubt? Low self-esteem? Gathering knowledge is the vital first step.
If your meditation app starts telling you to make your boundary permeable or open to another’s input into creating the boundary together, you’ll know they’re full of crap and shut that program down. Bring it back to yourself every time. Does this work for me, or does it not work for me? Boundaries are really that plain, even if they’re not always that easy.
Read more astrology columns here.
🌙 Sheridan
Astrology Coaching & Moon Sisters Circle
I help women who’ve survived trauma, untangle old conditioning, identify unconscious patterns, and take concrete, practical steps forward to regain control of their lives.